breakfast

thank you black jesus for inventing the eyeopener.

the bagel sandwich which tastes so good you know it must really have some cocaine in flour.

i had to make a specialty order.

toasted everything bagle. side of hash browns, cooked to crispy, then crack 2 eggs into the hash browns. scramble it all up.

add on some muester cheese.

then top with salsa.

its called an eyeopener.

the kid who made mine made one for himself cuz it sounded good.

then he made one for the cashier too, cuz it was so bomb.

breakfast to perfection.

i hope the next time, HOLE IN ONE BAGELS, in Broomfield Colorado, has the eyeopener on the menu

how fucking long do i have to fucking wait to get some fucking help

some guy yelled this out in the middle of a crowded staples today.

he shoulda been punched in the mouth.

what happened to treating people with dignity and respect.

there is one blond proctologist lady who is so god damn horrible that people run away when she comes shopping. every one in the store knows her they know her for being a HUGE BITCH.

she must be known in every retain shop that she frequents.

the blond bitch is a terrible menace on society. she should be terminated. her DNA should be eradicated from the face of the earth.

a woman this terrible can hardly be called a woman at all. she is more a lizard person. with forked tongue and very wet looking eyes.

knowing she has a son, who she is raising to be a terrible human is the worst part of all. the world doesnt need lizard bitches in the future.

customer service can suck it

customer service.

the service of the customer.

the customer is always right?

WRONG!

 

the customer is always an asshole.

 

i fear work. i fear the masses. the mass amount of jerky people out there. ready to wake up. and act like jerks.

i generally think the population is divided up so that good people are severly out numbered.

you ever see a game of keep away.

2 kids steal a hat from a nice little kid, then toss it back and forth, playing keep away.

sometimes there are 3 or 4 or even 5 kids keeping it away from one nice little kid.

the world is still like that.

 

2 to 1 :: jerks to good guys

maybe as high as 5 to 1.

thats as much as 90%…maybe.

oh well.

retail shopping is what the “economy is based on”

so we need to fix the economy

so we need to fix retail shopping.

but its really the customer that needs afixin’

a severe talking to

vacation time is over

it is time for me to find a new job.

a week off from work is very important every now and then. it reminds us what it is like is the world we are supposed to live in.

ya see,

 

when you are a kid, the world is as is should be. everything makes sence.

you got brought into this world, thinking, “i didnt ask for this.”

so after this miracle of life, you are heavly cared for and looked after. you are showered with unconditional love as a baby.

now it may just be a biological/sociological trick played us by our brains for evolutional purposes, or it may simply be they way all life is supposed to be lived. fill with the love of the people closest to you.

babys get free clothes, free food, free shelter, free love, attention. being a baby is the best.

thats how it should still be for grown ups too.

say that out loud while wearing a red shirt and get called a commy.

there is no free food or love or shelter when you are old.

everything is “worked for”, or “earned”, in the “real world”

what age does this trasition occur. from life-is-fucking-great baby, to awe-man-life-is-hard old person.

colleg if your lucky.

high school for many.

middle school for the unfortunate.

the worst part of all is. we dont even get to remember the baby stuff. its all forgotten. poof. somewhere is the dust netherregions of your frontal lobe burried in other less important but more current memories.

 

 

New Super Mario Bros. Wii

My life is sweet.

I got the next week off.

I got a new Droid.

I got new Super Mario Bros. Wii.

now i just need freinds to play this awesome multiplayer game with.

Sorry Its been so long

its been way to long since i have posted on my humor and ninja based blog.

 

sorry about that loyal reader.

 

but you can be happy to read now that i will be coming back with funny and witty and perhaps even ninja-y blogs to entertain your eyeballs for a few seconds while interweb surfing.

 

be ready.

Thank You Veterans.

I really needed that day off. Like you wouldn’t beleive.

 

(That must be the ‘freedom” everybody is talking about these days.

The freedom of not having to work, to honor the vets.

Ya know the “freedom” that young men approximately my age and description go and shoot guns at people, and then get shot for.

pardon the cliche, but… 

Freedom isn’t free.

(it costs a buck-o-five))

College Degree

It is a bill of sale.

Essentially a Diploma is nothing more than a Receipt.

A receipt that we frame. 

For some it was a good deal. if you find a really good bargain, i can see framing the receipt and hanging it on the wall.

a good bargain usually just means that the value of attaining it exceeds the opportunity cost of NOT having it.

 

only thing is. with anything, if you hang on to the receipt, you can usually return it.

 

Not the whole College scam. Its NONREFUNDABLE. suckers.

everybody knows you can get a college education for free. just look like a college kid and go to college classes. dont pay tution. you wont get the receipt, but you can steal the education with out any protest.

however, it is a great error in reasoning to think college is an affective way to teach young people.

most college students dont absorb the knowledge they are given anyway. they are simply tested. then forget the class. 

Learning is not valued in Academia, the way it once was. people actually sought out knowledge, for knowledge sake.

 

this is completely lost in the    Giant Bureaucratic Machine that is University.

 

If college does anything successfully, it weeds out families too poor to pay to send kids to college.

For kids with money, college couldn’t be easier. 15 hours of class per week, the rest of the time spent “studying” or “doing homework”, but that actually means surfing, and drinking beers from plastic tubes every week.

 

Very poor kids, just dont get to go to college i suppose.

If the Government were a dude, I would kick him in the balls for being an asshole.

Seriously government, WTF?

 

And Americans, WAKE THE FUCK UP! Its your fucking government, and you let them do this to us.

 

your government STEALS from you. Everyday. They print the money, that they give to you. then when you go to spend it, they fucking steal some of it back in sales tax

oops they musta gave you too much.

so you gotta work for money. which the government invented, and then started printing. so you work for say 10 dollars an hour for forty hours. 

40 hours x 10 dollars per hour = 400 dollars.

whooo hooo!

400 bucks, right? 

WRONG…dumbass.

you only get like 300$. the Government just fucking takes it. doesnt give it to you.

but you keep working anyway. cuz there is no choice

if you fill out the proper paper work, you can get some of that stolen money back at the end of the year.

 

The Government is the Pimp of America. It makes sure all us Bitches keep working to make that paper. (the paper that they printed in the first place.)

 

that damn shame is. i dont even want ANY fucking money at all.

just a Platinum American Express with not spending limit…..

 

 

or even better, how about a country, that is run more like a super giant Sandal Jamaca. ya know. all inclusive.

you just get in, everything is covered.

you know where to sleep, what to eat, what to wear,…sounds kinda like communism. only its a vacation.

=> communism =  vacation.

 

serisouly though,  American Government. Step Off. i mean come on. I’ve had it up to here with this shit.

If you don’t stop this stupid shit, I swear to Yoda that I will dedicate my life to abolishing this oppressive government.

 

 

many times you gonna jack the same guy, hu, Government? 

 

of course when you realize that the Government prints a fake piece of paper, tricks you into working really hard for it, in a job that you probably hate, to earn paper, that the printers of which then proceed to steal right back away from you.

Star Wars Fanboys

spoiler alert:

the last line of the movie is the funniest ever. 

“what if the movie sucks?”

BOOM

How can one trilogy be so amazing. Like Star Wars. 

That have lasting power. That make strong enough impressions to affect an entire generation of film makers.

Then to sell out real bad to sell Toys.

Episode I: Phantom Menace.

Episode II : Attack of the Clones.

Episode III: Revenge of the the Sith.

ALL SUCK!!

dont give me that shit that 3 was all right.

3 fucking sucked too.

as far as im concerned i am deleting the Star Wars Prequel Trilogy from my memory. Along with Matrix Reloaded and Matrix Revolutions.

Putting ‘em in my mental Trash Can (i’m a mac) and pressing Empty.

Those movies make me cring from complicated political boredom.

Why do you think lucas chose to Make Episode IV :  A New Hope the first fucking movie? Cuz its the bestest!

Luke blows up a death star! What could be better than that?

Wa Happens in the first three movies. 

Somebody bring me a jar jar binks mask….haha.

He came up with Chewbacca the Wookie.